We have all heard the quote "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results", yet somehow we don't think to apply this same universal concept to our personal 'relationships'. Yes, it's true...we all have patterns. If you have had a lifetime of the most AMAZINGLY harmonious, loving and healthy relationships than read no further...you are perfectly sane when it comes to love. Good for you! For those that can NOT say this, which is the MAJORITY of people, than please read on, unless you are happy continuously being in the toxic relationships. LOVE is a pattern. Who we attract, who we choose to love, who we don't choose to love and the quality of our relationships once we are IN them, are all patterns. Most of them are subconscious so you won't be able to analyze yourself objectively. You just need to know that if you keep getting in the wrong relationships than you have to 'change' something you are being, believing, doing or thinking. Maybe its a combination of all of the above. But to keep seeking new love or staying in a bad relationship because you don't know how to get out are just draining you of all your good love juju that you should be saving for the 'right one'. When they do finally show up...and they will, whether you are available or not...you may not recognize them if you yourself are not healthy, emotionally available and not completely burned out in the love department. I can assure you that no man or woman wants to be in love with the 'bitter one'. Begin taking an HONEST look at yourself and your relationships. What do they have in common besides YOU? If nothing, than it may just be you that needs the healing....but stop the insanity if you want real love
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We are living in times of over a 50% divorce rate and of the casual fling that begins with a swipe of a YES on a mobile dating app. Where has the love gone? Well I believe the problem is that noone really knows what love is anymore. My parents generation was about 'family'...getting married, buying the house with the white picket fence and having 3.5 children. What happened for so many of that generation is that when the kids were grown up and they didn't have them to hide behind anymore, they looked at each other one day and realized they didn't even know, or possibly even 'like' the person standing next to them, much less love them. They weren't necessarily marrying for love but doing what they were supposed to do by society's standards. (exceptions, of course!) SO what does that mean for people today? The word LOVE is on everything but still....do we really know what it means? How many parents teach their children how to 'recognize' true love? What to look for in a partner. What it takes to have a successful partnership and marriage? Not happening...because many still do not know what it is but can tell you what it is not. So we 'love' the word love today, without understanding it. Love is a presence of something. It is not butterflies in our stomach and giggles...it is made up of two independently strong, enlightened, realized people that have connected hearts and souls with one another because they understand that with the 'right person' they are better off together than alone. Our partner makes us better. They offer something to our life that brings substance and meaning to it. Love is not for the weary. Love takes courage, strength, commitment, trust, compassion, acceptance. forgiveness and it requires that we know ourselves first so that we can always remain true to who we ARE for ourselves and our partner. If we are going to change the direction of where love is going now and in the future it requires we KNOW what it is first and then remain conscious of it at all times. Commitment like this requires we go in with our whole heart open, not holding anything back. Find THAT person...and then it's easy to stay forever
Love is our highest calling & should be entered into with the highest regard for ALL that it is. God knew that we needed one another for acceptance, understanding, support, nurturing, friendship & LOVE in our EVERY day life...but there is more. We also need that ONE special partnership that touches our soul enough, to bring us closer to Him. Love is love. When we "know' love for each other, we greater understand the love He has for us. God knew that when we stand together in our partnership here on this earth, we can emotionally conquer ALL the challenges that the world present to us. As we conquer the outside world, God prepares us INSIDE for our work with Him. Only when we feel a true peace in our spirit, can we take on greater things. True love gives us that peace. We NEED our partner's love to fulfill our destiny.